I'm not sure where I start. I am not much of a "blogger". I have never read a blog let alone have I ever written one, but there is something about it that seems appealing, (therapeutic almost) that enticed me into the idea of sharing my stories in hopes to feel like I am not the only one out there.
So.....is this thing on????
You know when you get pregnant you worry about the big things like, will my child have a third eye in the middle of his forehead? Will he have the horrible buck teeth I did? (which he does by the way) Or will he go through "the awkward phase" (which I now believe is inevitable) But never once during my pregnancy did I ever for a second think, will my son be autistic? Thinking back I don't know if I had ever even heard that word before, well before the day that changed everything. Now it seems all I do is worry.
Liam was a some what normal baby (I mean he is mine after all) and for those of you who know me, know that I am not exactly "normal". But as babies go I had few complaints. He ate, pooped, cried, all the things babies do. He hit all his milestones, he talked our ears off at 18 months, with a pretty extensive vocabulary for a 1 and a half year old. He seemed to be right on track. Then we started getting these hints (that at first we thought nothing of) like Liam not playing WITH other children. He would play next to them, or across from them but would never engage with them. We chalked it up to him being more mature and independent. He had these intense emotional outbursts that could last any where from 5 minutes to hours. (Again he is my son so by examining the gene pool this could be seen as normal) :) But then in September of 2009 we got the message we just couldn't ignore.
We were hosting a play date/football party for us and family friends of ours. They had a little girl that Liam had pretty much known since birth. She was a preemie, so a bit of a peanut, adorable little thing that wouldn't hurt a fly. I remember the moment because in my head it played out in slow motion, like a movie scene. Almost like I knew that, this was the moment that was going to change the course of my life forever so I needed to remember it. The little girl was standing in my living room playing with one of Liam's toys minding her own business when out of no where and for no apparent reason Liam came running from across the room and tackled her while screaming as loud as he could. Flailing his arms and legs hitting and kicking her. My husband ripped him off but he didn't stop.....he couldn't stop. This wasn't my little boy, my angel. The monkey man that tells me I am his best friend and always has to give me fishy kisses, nosies, and 2 hugs each night before bed. This was a monster. The parents were freaked out, but handled it well. At the time the were good friends and did their best to not make the horror of the situation worst. We knew it was time to make the call and see someone who could help.
